Things I've learned

Love does NOT conquer all. It does however continue whether it's reciprocated, appreciated or even acknowledged. And the space for love is infinite. You can never love too many people and you can never love too much. Even if a relationship doesn't work out or you decide a friendship is too complicated or volatile to continue, it's ok to still love that person. So instead of "Love conquers all" perhaps it should be "love never dies". At least for me, that's true. I never stop caring about the people who have meant a lot to me at some point in my life, no matter what has happened between us.

I have been my own worst enemy. The only thing that has been stopping me from exercising, putting the right food in my body and treating myself well, is me. Sure there are outside forces that shape the way we think about ourselves. Learning to overcome and ignore the voice in your head, which is likely the result of us hearing someone else in our past or present, is one of life's biggest lessons. There is a huge culture of self-deprecation in this country. As I've tried to change my own internal thoughts regarding myself and others, I've noticed even more how intrinsic it is. Everyone seems quite content to work at jobs they hate, struggling to make it to Friday and then once again, dreading Monday. And since they're unhappy they spend a large portion of the day complaining about other people and why those people are the reason they are miserable. Stop blaming others for what is wrong with you. Happiness comes from within, not from without. Buying things, having friends and meeting the right person will not make you happy. YOU have to make you happy and then all that other stuff will come with time. That's why the happiest people can work the most mundane jobs and it doesn't matter. I used to find those people obnoxious. No wonder since I was so miserable. When people are that frustrated and resigned to hating life, their job, themselves and the people in their lives, they seem to seek out things to be unhappy about. How can you ever be happy if you spend all day thinking about how UNhappy you are?

Do what you love. This is one that I haven't figured out for myself yet, but I know it's true. Last weekend I was getting the oil changed in my car and an old man came in to the waiting room. I was looking in the small mirror I keep in my purse and he said to me, "you don't need that, you're pretty enough." I laughed, thanked him and put the mirror away. We talked about where we live and work for a while and he told me that he loved his job, from which he's now retired. I was about to ask him if he was bored as a retiree and he said, without prompting, "I wish I could go back to work." He told me he used to sell electrical equipment. If anyone was mean or rude to him, he wouldn't sell to them. That made me smile. I told him loving what you do is really important and I was still trying to find out what that is for me. He left shortly after that but I've thought about that conversation a lot for the last few days.